the Total Perspective Vortex

Here’s the problem that I’ve run into with blogging. I post some things, and get positive feedback. Then, I feel pressure to post something else, and get stuck. I’m worried that my next post won’t be as cool as the last. I have a bit of a self esteem boost when I research a topic and write about it, then I feel a mild knock when I find that others have more expertise and insight. It is interesting that there are millions of people blogging out there. The Internet is teeming with chatter. It is like the Total Perspective Vortex in the Restaurant at the End of the Universe by Douglas Adams.

The Total Perspective Vortex is allegedly the most horrible torture device to which a sentient being can be subjected.

When you are put into the Vortex you are given just one momentary glimpse of the entire unimaginable infinity of creation, and somewhere in it a tiny little mark, a microscopic dot on a microscopic dot, which says, “You are here.”

What I should do is just write and let my writing stand on its own merit. I can’t expect that the coolness and relevance of my posts will be forever on a linear upward gradient. (There, I’ve just done a mini-cognitive therapy session on myself!)

It makes me wonder why I’m blogging in the first place. I’ve always had the notion that I am a good writer, but that I’ve never taken the time to hone my skills. I have approached blogging as a format to do this. The idea is that the more you write, the better you get at it. In the past, there was no way to do this and have other people read it. With the Internet, now anyone can read it. I find that my writing is different when I’m writing for an audience. There is a certain element of shyness that must be overcome. I want to be honest, but not too self-disclosing. At the same time, I don’t want to appear self-righteous or pretentious.

I guess I am blogging because I want to be heard and acknowledged. Everyone has this basic need. We all want to feel a sense of relevance and importance.